...

I saw him from across the room watching me. There seemed to be aura eminating from him, attracting me towards him.
I confidantly edged towards him, with friend on cue, latched to arm, for moral support...

It was within the first week of getting to know each other that i realised that this was the beginning of something beautiful.

A year passes, allowing the bond to grow, the comfort levels to rise, the trust to mould, the love to flourish and the interest to never feign..

One night, in the span of an hour, our world comes to a standstill. His actions, thoughtless and inconsiderate, bring him down to his knees. It had not sunken in, that like everyone else, he was not invincible.

I cried most of yesterday, not out of sadness, but out of fear. Fear of losing the one that means the world to me. My best friend and soul mate. The fear of not knowing, but being told of the worst. The events of the weekend moved from bad to worse.. It made me realise how much he had take things for granted. It is not merely enough to be punished, but to learn from the punishments. Should the learning not take effect, the dire result is inevitable. Seems simple enough, right?

We wait in anticipation. Praying for the best, not thinking about the worst. I know that eveything will pan out alright...

hrm... days of old

its funny...
I think i've run out of ammo... or at least... conviction.. to party..
Once upon a time.. i would go out... at the drop of a hat... even after finishing work at 1-2am.. (hehe crazy burswood homies)

Nowadays... getting me out of the house and into a club.. is almost a rare occurence and quite an effort..
I miss going out.. but i don't.. it's like. i've been there.. done that..
So then what???

I spent the weekend before last, on a saturday night.. playing cs for 3 or 4 hours..
I can't remember the last time i spent so long on a game.. without me realising..
I coud've made it to metros... but then... i didn't go...
And i don't quite know if its becoz if i go... the bf will want to go too.. and usually... when he goes..
some sort of crazy trouble brews.. not really of his own accord either..

I ended up having a cs nightmare that night... there was some jap chick in a balaclava that wanted to knife me and my family. I ended up shooting her point blank with my rifle. Saved my family and the house. Only to see a whole shiet load of terrorists inching towards the house. I then decided to go to the toilet. Coz i thought that it would take a long time to kill the lot of them, and i was busting. I then woke up.... touched my self.. just to check that i hadnt accidently pissed my self... (and no i didnt)

hrm..

the weekend just passed... i cbf going to val's bday (which sounded.. well.. trashy - been there done that)... so i didn't..
And on the sat night... i went out to the movies on a double date with a mate to watch harry potter.
I felt kinda pathetic after (coz i didnt really love the movie)... so convinced the gang to drink my sorrows over at the flying scotsman..

was it becoz i over did it in melb/syd... that i just dont feel the itch to club and party hard like i used to?? or maybe over did it by the time i'd reached 21... And although i can say.. u know.. i've been there... blind drunk... to the point where i cant recall a single thing past a particular point... and done that.. drunk a half bottle of vodka straight within the space of getting picked up to getting dropped off at the club... it is the not point. Its not about doing the same old thing week in week out. It about having fun. Is it possible that drinking is no longer high on my agenda?? Is it possible that i've found ways to have fun without getting drunk??? I think no.. getting drunk is always, and always be a blast.. (i think so.. ) but then again, yes, maybe i have found other ways to entertain myself.. or has settling in with stevo tamed me down??

Just to be sure.. i think i need a good night out.
Starts this fri night. After work drinks at rosie's...
pity about the weather tho

u wanna know what really grinds my gears????

heres to me as i rant over the ways of my world...

What really grinds my gears..

Ppl who chose to continually pump the cross walk button whilst impatiently waiting for the pedstrian man to turn green.
ONCE is suffice nig. Its not gonna change any faster. If i was that button. I would just let u wait another 2 mins. Just for GRINDING my gears.

them young ones that think they look so COOL chuffing their fags and riding their bmx bikes. Pull up ur emo jeans and get some clean underwear on moite..

ridiculously stubborn ppl that cant get their mind around the fact that... the truth STINKS. I'd like to dedicate this to a colleague of mine. Shes preggers, with what the dr has told her is a girl. Her and her partner want a boy. She wants a girl merely for the fact "that she can have the first kid to carry on the family name". Apparently in her family, the first born male is the most important. After the news of the childs gender, she went on to another gp, only to b told the same news. She still doesnt believe them. Cheers to her if she prove em wrong. One more thing to add. In this family, when one of the couples found out that they were with child, the other couples followed suit. Its all abt having what the other has in this family. Thats what grinds my gears. Family competition. Even over having a child. Pathetic.
Also.. back to the unborn child. Its ur flesh and blood. Dont hate it just coz it wasnt born the right gender... this truth should never stink. Smile n b happy. And stop grinding these gears of mine.

pay-per-view WWE/ECW/RAW matches. Stevo pays bloody enough for foxtel, without having to pay to watch special telecast wrestling matches.

really impatient ppl. Example. I was waiting in line to ask a few questions regardingmy hbf membership. (as i find i cant seem to articuate myself very well over the phone - i like to go in in-person).. theres this biatch in the line that couldnt stop tsk-ings and tapping her feet and fidgetting. JUST GET OUT OF THE FRIGGIN LINE IF U CANT HACK THE WAIT. Before i kick yo booty out the door with my wound up gears...

telemarketers. Well.. who doesn't. But these days, when i pick up the fone... i don't get the sound of freshly made curry on the other line... lately ive gotten an american sounding machine recording that says.. "please hold onto the line. There is someone that wishes to speak to you regarding an important matter" .... F U you yank machine. How dare you waste my time, making ME wait while i get transfered to the curry vendor...

(sorry if i've offended any indians out there. Its just that 99% of the time, the telemarketers i've had are indian. I call indians curries.. curry munchers even... Crunchers for short.)

Disorganised ppl. Nothing peeves me more than ppl that don't have a clue of the important things that they involve themselves in/others in. If you organise a get together/trip... and then CANCEL... please inform all the ppl you;ve invited. We cant read ur mind.

Anonymous random msgs that ask me how i am, tell me of how long i havent seen anon, and if im free to catch up with them, Who is this? And y are u too chicken shit to CALL? and why after so long do you chose to msg me? What do u want from me... ? Sometimes... these msgs are seriously purely random. From persons i dont know. I think. Im never too sure as i've never replied. Dont grind my gears even more by making me lose credit just msging back dear random.

The fat kid that decided to jump in the elevator. I thought it was gona break. Then i thought i was gonna break him.
Lucky for him it was my stop.

Ppl that do up excels. This doesnt reallygrind my gears exactly. I think its funny.... now that i think abt it.. Ha! tossers...

Ppl that chose to type like this. I think kimmye knows what i mean. It Is ThE AzN kEwT thiNg to Do lahh.
i waNa eAt αρρℓє.. вαиg вαиg вαиg... 4nd hav3 a n1c3 n4p. There is no friggin NEED to decorate ur bloody sentences fools. English is a complicated enough language without you fucking about with fancy charcters and substituting numbers for letters.

i think thats enough for now. I gotta calm myself down now after unleashing some of my pet peeves.

p.s. Thank you peter griffin, for starting me off on my 'grind my gears" crusade

Toit like a toiger

i am friggin exhausted... but in a good way...
Been to the gym everyday since sat, and thanks to K, i've FINALLY gone to a class at FF...

Let me recap my second class, which was body combat...
Not only did i learn how slow and unco i really was... but it also made me realise that should the old granny in front of me (who was belting out "hoo" "haa" "haiya" every few seconds) feel even slightly treatened....she had enough goolies to smack me the fuck out..

Once i had mastered punching and hooking.. the bloody instructor decides to move on with another set of moves... How the hell was i supposed to understand when everythings going on at lightning pace??? Not happy jan.. not happy.

I did note though, that the instructor dude was wearing white pants... and i could see sweat marks... well.. Lets just say... his sack was wet.

Note to self. Dont wear white pants when at gym. Even if i suddenly worked up an utterly toned butt.
Another note to self. When i get old and senile, and have bad bladder control and cant afford tena pads, wear white pants.. and if anyone asks.. tell them i've just had an extreme work out at the "gym"..

Awesum. All i have to add is.. i managed to run 3k in just under 20...

Now im off to finish my twisties. $1.79 for a 190g pack at coles ppls!!

yummy half born duck...

i was once told by a friend of this asian delicacy where half born duck eggs are eaten, much like boiled eggs.
Not to mention being fkn distusting, I told proceeded to tell the friend how it was acts like this that groups like RSPCA are for..

A FRIGGIN STILL BORN DUCK!!!!


A SEMI MATURED DUCKLING OF ALL THINGS!!!! have we already run out of things ot eat..??????

Anyway... last night, i went out to one of stevo's friends houses... Whereby they decided to offer us these said "duck" eggs. I was in shock. These fabled eggs... we served infront of me. I eyed the table. More for the JW that was sitting to the corner... then i looked at the eggs. Much like any duck egg really. Large looking, Boiled. White.. But it was whaat was within that was the big surprise...

I see stevos eyes shine with glee.. and this other dude light up as well.. I was about to be sick...

i watch them crack the shell, delicately,... and then slowly slurp out the juices out of the egg... "mmmm mmmm slurp"
then gently breaking more of the shell i see the yolk. But unlike anormal hard boiled egg yolk.. it is off yellow, like a brownish yellow.. with veins.. yes veins. Apparently the white albumin bit is hard and chewy.. plastic like.. so that's discarded. But it all about the yolk... aprarently.... I watch intently.. and i see this guy fool around with the bloody egg. He pulls the yolk this way and that and eventually he proudly shows off a friggin DUCK EMBRYO. This one had developed more than they are apparently "supposed to", revealing beak, a few feathers and a pronounced head.

....
grouse lil shits.. i think..
But then i get dared to eat the lil fkker. Not the embryo, but a fresh one.

I follow the drill. Suck the juices n all.. That bit is good. Tastes like marrow bone.
I try the white bit. Really bloody hard.. Prolly coz it neccesary to protect the embryo or something...
Ditch that bit. Then head for the yolk..
I dont dare to mess with the bitch. Stuff the whole thing in my mouth. Veins, bird remnants and all. Chew chew swallow.

Not bad.

Ive never heard of a more inhumane delicacy.. but then.. i guess its just like.. having an egg.. and a duck.. and having the best of both worlds.

If anyone knows of something more repulsive. Fill me in.

thanks for stating the obvious biatch.

Me taking a dump is about as normal as me eating. The two go hand in hand... though dont take it too literally..

Last week i had to let Mr Brown out in unfamiliar territory.. (as i am usually exclusive.. and prefer sticking to the throne in my own home/stevos home). So... i go about my own business. Purely natural.

Upon completion.. i am greeted by some NOBODY who decides to let me know.. "F*&%$! ur shit stinks!....sdfjkfnjnej"

Thank you Einstein. Thats probably thanks to a diet consisting of johnny walker, kitkat, durian and salad.

How abts you use YOURS as a fragrant oil and use it as potpourri since u think that your shit dont smell, biattch??

hrm. biatch u caught me on a bad day. Under normal circumstances i would have proudly grinned and given u a hi 5.

ebay!

i've finally caught on to the phenomenon that is.. Ebay.
After months and even years of procrastinating and riduculing and hearing stories of ppl buying and even bidding on things as ridiculous as eaten toast.... i've decided to start up my very own personal ebay account..

And in the space of a day i managed to get myself a new pair of work pants for 99c (and $7 postage), a clear skin mobile cover for $1.99 and a teeth whitening system.... =)

I've spent waaay too many hours on the net looking up intersting, useful things to purchase.. neglecting my strict gym schedule, and instead turning to the kitkats (which i bought a plenty in woolies - 1.99 for a whole BLOCK) and milkt bar (also 1.99).
I'm feeling bloody lethargic and haven't even managed to take the dog for her walk.... conclusion... ebay = too time consuming.
On the other hand.. there is some pretty good shit out there...

On another note.. we've got new pathwest cadets in my work for a month. Basically, theyre students still in their medical science degree, but theyve been selected out of the group to have paid work exp for a month....
So anihoo.. theres we got a dude in the department... and who do you tink is the lucky one they dumped him on..
I'm really not in the mood 70% of the time im at work. I live for lunchtimes, morning teas, afternoon teas, and for antibiotic picking - where i dont have to listen to my colleagues pathetic conversations on the state of their laundry or the price of their new mattress protector, and basically work iin sollitude, piping up now and again to discuss with a more vibrant colleague my recent states of gas release. Yes it is a bit depressing and mundane.. but hey.. i dont do much, its easy work, i get a good pay and dont take my shit home.

Back to the fresh meat. Theyve basically dropped him at my feet. Frankly, he talks too much, and may even be batting for the other team (not that i have a problem with that). All in all, hes cramping my style. Why leave me with the new trainee... its coz im the noob isnt it...??? And just for laughs, theyre leaving me with him again 2mrw, on my picking day. (i.e. the day i pick any bacterial pathogens cultured from the specimens of the previous day, and test out theyre antibiotic sensitivities ).. argh.. hindrance.. guess the poor guy is preety much fed up with looking at urines... but thats not the point.. not the point....

deep breath

i think i need to go back to body balance and to the gym. my way of destressing. might be better on the work exp dude. feeling sorry for him now, him being stuck with me and all.